The journey of Change and Growth

Let's be honest for a minute. Motivation is a fickle friend. It shows up all excited on January 1st, hanging around just long enough for you to buy expensive workout gear, some nice self help books, then disappears faster than free food at an event. The Bible puts it rather poetically in Proverbs 16:9: "In their hearts humans plan their course, but the LORD determines their steps." (NIV) Which sometimes feels like divine code for: "That brilliant five-year plan you made? Adorable. Now watch this plot twist." I remember reading somewhere that Thomas Edison failed more than 10,000 times before successfully inventing the light bulb. When asked about it, he supposedly said, "I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work." And I'm thinking... mate, after attempt 9,997, did you never just look at the bulb and say, "You know what? Candles aren't that bad. Fire is quite cosy, actually." The Mythical Well of Willpower ...

Let's travel back in time a bit or rather the beginning of time as Christians know it. There he was Adam with his wife Eve in the Garden of Eden. God commanded "You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die." (Genesis 2:16–17, NIV). The serpent came along and said to Eve "Did God actually say, 'You shall not eat of any tree in the garden'?" Now I know you've probably heard this story a lot but let's get some bit of perspective here. God gave Adam and Eve everything just except for one. But when the serpent came along he made it seem like they were not given a lot. He shifted their focus from abundance to lack. The more that they had all of a sudden was now less than that one thing that they did not have. I really want you to think about this in your life. Many times we are so focused on the little less that we do not have and ...

Freedom Day Observed: Are We Really Free? Today is Monday, it's holiday in South Africa where I am, where I live, they are calling it Freedom Day Observed, meaning yesterday was Freedom Day. So because Sunday was a holiday hence today we are resting from the holiday yesterday. Now my question is what is freedom. Or according to exactly how he asked it "What is Freedom". Muzi (the weird guy stays next door): "It is a way that people express themselves without judgement." Raphel: "Freedom is the ability to do anything, anyhow anywhere without..." Ontatile: "Freedom to me is whereby I can be able to do whatever I want to, but the whatever that leads me to those things consists of money but I can not do that because I lack money." The Definition Dilemma (Because Everyone's Got One, Don't They?) Funny thing about freedom, everyone bangs on about it, waves flags for it, even dies for it, but ask ten people what it means and you'll...

10 Days to Go!!! Do we know the 90-day rule? Probably not. I suspect most don't. It's this bizarre dating probation period where you're meant to withhold... physical affection... for 90 days to ensure the bloke actually likes you rather than just what he can get. Quite the strategy, that. I was discussing this with a colleague yesterday, and she asked the pivotal question: "What happens when you give it up on day 80?" "Then you give it up!" I replied, rather obviously. "But it's not a guarantee that he will stay with you forever." This got me thinking about my own 90-day challenge. Not about cookies (the euphemistic kind or otherwise), but about this bloody morning routine I've been attempting since January 6th. Eighty days in, and here we are. The Grand Morning Plan (That Went Predictably Pear-Shaped) Ah, January. That magical time when we all collectively lie to ourselves about becoming entirely new people. I made this grand co...

The Real Influence The world that we live in. Filled with a bunch of these 'influencers'. Yes the Kardashians and what nots of the 21st century. People who know everything, known by everyone and somehow seem to dictate how we should live, the standards the people we should hang around the filter we should use on our photos and when to post and not post on our timelines. We are not going to talk about that kind of influence today. Today we talk about a different kind of influence, one that inspires people not to do more but to be more. Influence that inspires people to grow and become the best versions of themselves. The Blue-Tick Validation (Because That's What Really Matters, Innit?) Let's be honest, shall we? We've created a bizarre ecosystem where individuals famous primarily for being famous tell us how to live our lives. They've mastered the art of the perfect selfie angle, sponsored content that doesn't look too sponsored, and captions that somehow...

Vishen Lakhiani calls them "Brules" those Bullshit Rules we follow religiously despite the fact they're draining our life force one compliance at a time. Like those fish who don't know they're wet, we swim through these Brules without even noticing. They're the water we breathe, the cultural smog we've inhaled since our mewling infancy. The Inheritance of Absurdity (A Rather Dramatic Title, I'll Grant You) I was reminded of something Friedrich Nietzsche once said: "Sometimes people don't want to hear the truth because they don't want their illusions destroyed." Bit dramatic, our Fred, but he's got a point, hasn't he? We cling to our Brules like security blankets, even when they're strangling us. These Brules aren't just personal neuroses no, they're generational hand-me-downs. Think about it. Your great-grandparents believed certain things because their environment demanded it. Your grandparents inherited thos...

We've all heard some version of it, haven't we? "You reap what you sow." "Give and you shall receive." Those timeless principles packaged and repackaged across centuries, religions, and TED talks all essentially saying the same bloody thing: value out follows value in. But let's be honest, shall we? In our swipe-right, instant-gratification culture, the patience required for genuine value creation feels almost... quaint. The Great Value Misconception (Or Why Everyone's Waiting for Their Ship That Never Bloody Sails) I was reminded of that brilliant exchange from "The Wolf of Wall Street" between Matthew McConaughey and Leonardo DiCaprio: Mark Hanna: "You know what a fugazi is?" Jordan Belfort: "Fugazi... it's a fake." Mark Hanna: "Fugazi, fugazi. It's a whazy. It's a woozie. It's fairy dust." That's what most people's understanding of "adding value" is fairy dust. They bel...

Alright people, it's 23:01, I'm up writing a blog that I should have written at 05:00 but I didn't. I almost went to sleep without writing it. In fact I was just winding down and thinking about how tomorrow will unfold when I thought sh*t  blog! So here it is folks, my 76th working day of the year, Family Day according to the South African calendar so to say.  Have you ever noticed how we've collectively decided to treat mistakes like they're the apocalypse? Like somehow fumbling through life warrants a dramatic score and a slow-motion replay of our embarrassment? Rubbish, I say. Complete and utter rubbish. I've been thinking lately (dangerous pastime, I know) about this whole concept of mistakes. The word itself feels laden with judgment, doesn't it? Mis-take . As if life were a perfectly choreographed film and you've gone and botched your line, wasting everyone's time and the director's patience. But hang on a minute, what if we're not ma...

Ice breakers, quite lovely activities aren't they? We had one at work last week. We had new people coming to join us. The ice breaker was that we should go around in a circle and mention something about ourselves that only we know about and no one else. I was the fifth person to go and I really thought about it for a second I didn't know what to say. After a long and very brief pondering I REALISED, actually I do not have a personality in fact I have many different personalities. My personality bends so to suit the environment as well as the people in it. According to the scholars there are four different personality types. I will list them with their general features. Melancholic: Thoughtful, analytical, prone to existential crises at 3AM while scrolling through Instagram Sanguine: Optimistic, social, the type who posts inspirational quotes over sunset photos they definitely didn't take Phlegmatic: Calm, relaxed, probably has their notifications turned off and we all secre...